Healing starts with self-forgiveness. Most hurt and anger come from a need to forgive oneself. Not the horrific pain of being a victim of violence and abuse, or that of losing a loved one, but the hurt and pain that results from our everyday life and choices. Even if we don't feel at fault in that instance, we question ourselves. Was I too harsh? Was I not understanding or compassionate enough? Was I too quick to judge? Too slow to forgive? Was I holding onto some perverse need for retaliation or vengeance? Until we can forgive ourselves and our human emotions we can't begin to heal. Try it: allow yourself to love yourself, allow yourself to forgive yourself, allow yourself to heal.